BirKrishna
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 What is Depression???
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Posted on 11-10-09 11:09 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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 I hear a lot about depression, but I cared less about it. However, lately it feels like I have some symptoms of depression. I feel depression should be more common with people like us who come to US from third world country, struggle and end up empty-handed. When on TV I see a man or a woman showing symptoms of depression and ..........."depression hurts... Cymbolta can help", I LOL because I think they are Americans, they have every  opportunity and every wealth, they should be happy. Again I think "Sunaako thailo haata ko mailo k garnu dhana le saag ra sisnu khayeko besha anandi mann le" meaning they have more confusions than we do. With me it's basically lack of interest. My to-do list piles up for (I don't know) some weird reasons. For example, I have to apply at some grad school but I have not done it yet because it requires recommendation letters from professors and they want my resume to write one. Had I have those kind resume and experiences, I would not be joining grad school (again they are white folks they think differently). But I have not participated in any faternity organizations or school events and made straight A's. It so happened that while in community college I barely made a GPA to get admitted in the university where I wanted to go. I got scared (of not being able to maintain gpa for scholarship) so I quit my GS job and started only studying. Sure enough the plan collapse and my loan was mounting. After graduating I could not go to dhoti consultancy, because I had to continue to work to pay bills so I missed that chance too. I am an IT student but none of the home works I did myself, my friends helped me and I thought it was a piece of cake. Now even I have a 4 yr degree at IT I know barely anything about computers. Some of my close friends say I lack courage to try to do things. So what is it? Is it my laziness? My depression? or ? How could I get over it and get a life that every nepali dreams when landing on  to this land of opportunity???           
 
Posted on 11-10-09 12:11 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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BirKrishna Ji.......you just wrote my life up there.......exactly same as yours, except I am still on my 2nd year........Laziness bhanam bhane, I wasn't that lazy back in Nepal, Paadai ma kamjor bhanam bhane I was decent student. Depression nai ho bhanera bhanam bhane it's not like I am sad all the time, not talking to anybody. I think it might be just a symptoms of minor depression. Sano kaam, like going online and paying bill which is due tomorrow lai paani ekchin ma garam la bhandai 1 week beetchha.....I am glad you raised this issue and I am quite sure it's common with lot of Nepalese in USA, coz I have seen lot of my friends in US they don't have much creativity or excitement about life or future. I would be glad if someone can come up with their life experience of how they deal with this kinda issue.

 
Posted on 11-10-09 12:30 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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As per the summary you folks have presented I would rule out clinical depression therefore with no prescribed medications without therapeutic sessions. From your synopsis it appears the development of procrastination- personality. In simple terms: an individual looking for easy way out in absence of proactive lifestyle.


Presenting the 2 cents: look for a life coach/mentor. If not read some self-help positive oriented books. Again the suggestions I presented is limited to the summary you wrote


 
Posted on 11-10-09 12:31 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Its called frustration, not depression. And, it is because you are not focused!! How can you go through all the hardship to get educated in the US, get a diploma but not know what you learned? But that is past. Lets talk about the future.

If I were you, I would get a blank piece of paper and write down what I want to accomplish in X number of years. Then I will write down what I want to accomplish in X+Y number of years and so on. Then, every night before I go to bed, I will make sure that I did not deviate from THAT goal, and every morning after I wake up, I will remind myself about THAT goal. I would work towards attaining THAT goal and believe that I will attain IT. Remember the story from Ramayana and Mahabharata; Rama and Arjuna hitting the target; the trick is to be FOCUSED!!

Good Luck with your grad school!! And this time, try doing your friends' work instead of having them do yours.

 
Posted on 11-10-09 12:35 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Btw, also ask yourself if you are really can survive grad school. If you don't think you can, make yourself competent in your field of studies. Its not too late and as long as you have a good GPA in grad school, it would not really matter how you did in your undergrad.

And I believe, depression is something that happens after recession. You, Mr., are in the R period and if you don't act fast, you are bound to hit D.

Last edited: 10-Nov-09 12:38 PM

 
Posted on 11-10-09 12:44 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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You said you don't know anything about computers but have a degree in IT ??...My friend what I would suggest is take some IT courses from community college if you don't have any knowledge in computers or find the field that really interests you..If you haven't done soul searching this is the best time to do so...What is your overall G.P.A.  and what did you major in??...


It is not end of the world...You said you want to join Grad school, get a killer score in GRE/GMAT, write a Personal Statement stating the reason for not doing so great in the undergrad...Admission Commitees are also human and they do understand the pressure undergrad student goes through specially "International students:...so, buckle up, put a smile on your face and 'FOCUS'...let me know if you need any help..


Axl


 
Posted on 11-10-09 3:21 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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same here........I am depressed, frustrated and upset. Wtf i have to do.........................?


 


 
Posted on 11-10-09 4:07 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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ya Mr. Birkrishna and khattam manchhe it is the combination of depression, frustration and the expectation that we have from here. Back home we used to think that in USA everything is just like heaven money making is just like picking flower and once we get the american degree we can easily get good job and money, but things are not so here. Me too I was one of the brightest student in class back home, but here I don;t have any motivation, when I see those guys graduating not getting job I get more frustrated.


 


Mr Sand_deep I want to get a job within 6 months and I am trying hard for it but I am not getting any shit of response, so sometimes I will do this in X or Y years doesn;t make sense. So the best thing to do is to face the reality that it is hard and it is not like we used to think back home and consolate ourselves thinking that lots of  our country men are in the same boat including me.


Lots of Nepalese are passing through this situation, some are affected mildly some are severly some admit some don;t admit. If u think u r taking it too seriously go for counsellling in the university, and don;t be afraid to get medication a try. This bleak economic condition also is a contributing factor.


I will say try not to think much though me myself has not been to do so.


 
Posted on 11-10-09 4:07 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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add my name in the list..............

 
Posted on 11-10-09 7:31 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Mr. Alcchethigro, I am speechless.

But, do not worry. I will soon* open job opportunities for F1 students. The catch is, they would have to go to the university I tell them to go to.

I was able to come up with this solution because I took me a whole lot of blank pieces of paper, a pen and started formulating the business plan. One of the the main components of the business plan was to construct the time line.

Time A = Graduate from the university
Time B = Get the required work experience and certificates & more education
Time C = Raise enough money from the market to open the jobs
and so on ....

(Each time coordinate had&have numerous sub-time coordinates.)

Throughout the whole process, I did not take it into consideration as to what tomorrow holds. I just wanted to be prepared, just in case. It would be terrible if everything were to work out and I did not have a plan. I also made sure that I have all the required knowledge to pursue my goal. But the main point is..... ONE HAS TO BE FOCUSED!!

* a decade!!

 
Posted on 11-10-09 11:00 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Look around you...........this is deression

 
Posted on 11-11-09 11:40 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Thank you so much for yall's responses. I thought sajha is the portal for making fun of others and posting things like "Nepali kti haru le sabai dekhau na thale". Today i am sure sajha is a cure of what I am going through. I think I would be tired of explaining my situation to doctors here in America, but nepaliko mann nepali le nai bujhchha few sentences help identify my situation and provide cure too. My response could be answer to some folks, please find respective response and answer them.


I think I am an over ambitious individual with less motivation and trying to put less efforts toward doing it. And when you do not put enough effort, your motivation lowers. For example, i would have to run lots of errands, but I take it easy and do not do them until it's too late. It's been more than a week I hadnot started walking 5 miles a day or started working out. Or applied to grad schools for about a month because I am scared to face professors since I do not have resume that involved me in various activities and I will be ashamed when they asked "then what would I put in your recommendation letters?" However,  I made straight As in their classes and actively participated in their classes (but it's already more than a year if they would remember about my contribution to their classes). So , I spend my time doing less important thing that for a little bit keep myself happy like watching movies or songs on youtube instead of doing important things. Even if it's like paying bills on computer I would proscastinate.


Also, I feel I am a lonesome person. For sometime if I have a friend he would not be frens for ever and i feel I hurt him some reasons that's why I get jealous when others have lots of "wall writings on facebook" page but  not me.


As far as my academic background goes: until sophomore years I was planning on doing accounting. Then my roommate brother suggested me doing IT since I was little brilliant students (according to him and I couldl easily find a job when I graduated). Even with my hardwork at work and school, I end up making barely enough GPA to get admitted in university. Then I was like how come brahmins are so sharp and with little or no  hard work end up making straight As. Well that's that. So, after joining university I quit my GS job and started studying all the time and started learing. This all chaneged until I met this guy who would do all my homeworks. So, I have my ungrad GPA of 3.58 with majority from my business classes ( i have diploma in BS in IT from school of business). After this I could not taking consulting from Dhoti because my bills were moounting and I had to work to pay them. Again this is an excuse I knew I could sleep 5 hours instead of 8 hours and do that , but i did not do.


Regarding my academic background: until my sophomore years I wanted to do accounting.But my roommate brother taught me into doing IT.  he got a BI job after graduating with business degree taking training in some other states and taking job in different state. I think he had some loan too but he was courageous enough to take risk...... after all he is  a brahmin.  It 's not that I do not like IT, I do and I want to  experiments with computers like formatting computers to make it brand new and such but i am afraid I might screw up. If you do not  think computer is not my cup of tea, then what would you think is my cup of tea? I am really good at memorizing things-- I know all my debit cc nos, expiration, sec code; all license tag numbers of about 20 cars of th relatives here in US; about 20 nos of business here in DFW; anything I look at once I can memorize real easy. AMOF,  this posting which I am wrting was deleted 3 times (for some reasons) I was able to write word-to-word same eventhen.         


Hey axl, what kind of personal letter you are talking about, can you help me with that? Hope all this explaination will help shedding light to my situation and provide more insightful suggestions.


Thanks


 
Posted on 11-11-09 12:29 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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Depression is an expression of defeated mentality. cheer up guys, cheerfulness brings triumph inside out.


 
Posted on 11-12-09 9:50 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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guys looking for more consuling.


 
Posted on 11-12-09 11:39 AM     Reply [Subscribe]
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now here, you are presenting your frustrations rather than clinical depression... a suggestion could be to seek for career counseling which can help in career exploration based on your personality, interests, and skills...one of the popular career exploration tool is "self-directive search" (you can google it as well) which can help you assess your career path...


to summarize your diagnostic summary through treatment plan is to seek career counseling at your university career centre, career counselor, employment counselor or the local career center/ public libraries...hope this help you.


 


 
Posted on 11-12-09 5:45 PM     Reply [Subscribe]
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No matter what you do alcohol is not a substitute.

I am hugging computer all day long. Am I trying to recover from Depression? Or I am addicted with internet ??????????
Last edited: 16-Nov-09 09:41 AM

 


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